Why’s everyone complaining about overlays; it’s the underlays that are the problem.
I’ve been in this awful game for years, I’m tellin ya, me and the dinosaurs were buddies back in the medieval donkey days – so listen up losers, I’m diatribin from experience. That Greg Ferrous, he’s a wise fella; almost like a father to me (more so than my daddy Uncle Philip ever was) and he’s got the right idea alright. Ethan Banksy’s probably a high-five ditto on this two but I think he’s too into his graffiti these days – that guy can sure handle a can. I’m like those guy ya knows, always standing on the long tail of the edge curve near the bleedin tangent, and all that. Anyway, these overlays… whoah, let’s get to the start right, else you datagrumble distributtin dumbo’s aint gonna understand nuthin.
The day it all showered on me didn’t start well, screw Monday’s hey and just to make it worse, we had this forever long ‘meeting’ with these VMWare jockeys. I trudged in and lord (we’re all Gods siblings right), it didn’t look good; the usual smart ass sales drones, one male and luckily one femail. Don’t worry, I get this sexism thing, I ain’t gonna be usin no junk rapper type words here, I got respect. Downer though, no junk in the trunk to speak of on this one, nothing worth spanking there; nothing to help keep me entertained. After the intro’s blah blah and all that I got comfy and settled down in a kick ass chair for a snooze. I could ask all the right questions later anyway; “Does it actually work?”, “Summarise the business benefits for me?”, “How Much!!!!?” – you know how the story goes right? Drinks later, on them and hey, what’s the difference between a good lie and the truth after a few bevvies? Who knows and who cares, let just get this game done.
An hour or too later and I’m comin round into conshushnuss just as they get into all the heavy heavy on VXLAN and overlays and stuff. It was getting well complicated; virtualisation, encapsulation and all sorts but it sounded proper good. Sexy screens, none of that dark art DOS prompt rubbish I gotta do every day (a tip from me: upgrade to HyperTerminal). Stuff that all the suits were always bangin on about to get ahead of the bend where the enemy was concerned. Why couldn’t peeps just be cool and stop with all that competition stuff. Anyway, I’m tellin ya, now is the time to shrug off the shackles of times past and join the time of the future and make it now – get me?
Virtualise it all, that’s the answer and aint no one gonna argue against the debate for that. It’s like a new reality, a better, virtual one that puts you totally in charge boss. You gotta be flexible around reality; it’s what you make it I can tell ya. My old chem class buddies are makin there own reality every day, they know where it’s at. Intelligence aint all its cracked up to be apparently and I believe that’s the truth. So, anyway, we shoved this stuff in and it all works real good and it got me wondering, what’s the point of all this underlay stuff right? I thought software keys were a con but have you seen the price of that stuff? We don’t need that junk anymore, look what we got from VMWare right, that other stuff sucks, I don’t and won’t touch it anymore dude. One of the guys said “just because it’s useless doesn’t mean it isn’t necessary”. WFT, what’s with these people getting all Fraud on me, no wonder it all coming off the train with these starry eyed people keepin the show on the path.
Listen to Greg and Banksy, listen to that Brad Headlunge geezer and Jason Endermen, believe me, there’s this big census around this thing – I’m all over it like hair on a bear*, literally; keep up and keep it real people, junk those underlays before you get left behind in the rubbish bin of the real physical past. Word!
Just in case you missed the fact, this article is satirical; all spelling mistakes, poor grammar and incorrect and inconsistent use of slang and accents are intentional.
*Thanks Frank ‘I’m surrounded by idiots’ Ducker